Football March For Gorilla
At a football match one day a man tried to get into the game with a gorilla.“Look ”said a copper, “I saw you with him yesterday and told you to take him to the zoo.”
“Yes I did that, and then we went to the cinema and had a meal. So today I thought he might like to see a football match.”
大猩猩看足球比賽
有個人帶著一只大猩猩去看足球比賽，被站在英語培訓學校旁邊的一位警察撞見了。警察便說：“昨天我就看到你帶著大猩猩，我不是告訴你把它帶到動物園去嗎？”
那人答道路：“我去過了，然后又帶它去了電影院，然后一塊兒吃了頓飯。我想今天該帶它看一場足球比賽了。”
The Hard Rats
Three rats are relaxing in a bar. After a few jugs they start talking about how tough they are. The first rat says,” When I woke up there was a matchbox of Rat-o-kill outside my hole. I ate the whole lot and didn’t feel a thing.”
After a signficant pause and a few more glasses, the second rat chips in,” “When I got up this morning, there was an enormous rat trap with a huge piece of prime cheese for bait. I stepped in , caught the bar on my back, ate the cheese and then slipped out without even a bruise.”
At this, the third rat gets up and heads for the door.
“Where are you going.” Ask the two other rats.
“Aw, I’m bored here. Think I’ll go home and shag the cat again.
大話老鼠
三只老鼠在酒吧里喝酒，幾杯下肚，便忍不住開吹起來。第一只老鼠說：“今天早上我起床時發現洞口有滿滿一火柴盒的滅鼠靈。我一口氣把它都吃光了，可居然什么事兒都沒有。”
不知不覺中又喝了幾杯。第二只老鼠說道路：“今天早上我起床時，發現洞口有一個巨大的捕鼠器，上面還有一大塊乳酪。我絲毫也不畏懼，一下就跳了進去，一邊用手撐著夾子，一邊把乳酪吃得一干二凈，然后從夾下退出來，卻也毫發未損。”
這時候，第三只老鼠站起身來就要往門外走。
“你要去哪兒？”另兩只老鼠問道。
“是這樣，”老鼠說，“我感到有點厭了。還是回家逗逗貓更好玩。“
